Gamzee x Reader (ThE sTaRt Of a MiRaClE)
by BurningSilhouette
Summary: This is a six chapter Gamzee fan-fiction, reader x Gamzee. But really you can imagine any character you want in the place of "yourself". Tread carefully, your feels will be crushed. This is a cross between High!Gamzee/Sober!Gamzee. A bomb on your feels is imminent.
1. ThE sTaRt Of a MiRaClE

_**((Homestuck and all it's characters belong to Andrew Hussie. BUT YOU BELONG TO GAMZEE, hehe. WARNING: There is lemon in the third chapter and if you don't like it, just read up to the part where you're at Gamzee's and then the last three paragraphs. REMEMBER THIS IS IN THE THIRD CHAPTER. There is also intense violence at the very end, but that's the most important part.))**_

You awaken in a daze, your intense amber eyes drifting open slowly. That's when the nausea, the headache, the consequences of last night hit you with brutal force. You moaned in agony as you turned and buried your face in your pillows. Somehow, you had gotten into your bed last night after a heavy drinking session.

You didn't know how much time passed by before you heard your door open and somebody step in. It had to have been one of your brothers or your sister. Dave Strider, Dirk Strider, or Roxy Lalonde. But you had a feeling it was Dave. Dirk is a master of stealth and Roxy wouldn't let a hangover catch up with her, so she'd be stumbling in. But of course you knew that.

"_?" You heard Dave's voice call your name and you turned your head to look at him. He had some advil in one hand and a glass of water in the other with his usual expressionless expression. You reached out for them both and took the pills, washing them down with water and taking a few more sips before setting it on your nightstand. But Dave was still standing there, looking at you with his arms crossed. You knew you'd done something embarrassing last night, except you didn't know what it was. Yet. Though you dreaded to hear it.

"Yeah? What's up?" You croaked as you pulled a pillow down and hugged it close to your body. He sat down on the edge of the bed and adjusted his damn cool shades.

"You told me and Roxy all about your secret crush on that juggalo assclown last night."

He was talking about Gamzee Makara, a Highblood troll you accidentally fell in love with. But nobody knew that until NOW. You groaned and hid your face back into the pillow and, with of moan of pure mortification, you said "Oh dear god, what did I say?"

"Oh just apparently that you're all torn up inside about it and you wish he loved you back."

"You better not rap about it."

"What no just listen, you need to tell him how you feel. That little asshole has 'red rom' feelings about you or some shit. Whatever that means."

Your heart soared in your chest and practically jumped out of your throat. It meant he loved you in a romantic way, though it was his alien and troll way. But of course you already knew that too. But why was Dave talking to you about this? He's too cool for feelings.

"Would you mind telling me why YOU'RE the one talking to me about this?"

"Don't be a drama queen, you're my sister and this doesn't fly with me. Plus Roxy's already off her face as usual."

"Well... thanks, Dave." You gave him a warm smile as you lifted your face out of your pillow once more and you saw his lips twitch into his cocky signature smirk. "Yeah, whatever, don't get all sappy with me. Feel better, _."

Then he pushed himself off your bed and left, the door clicking softly as it closed behind him. You sighed and cuddled your pillow, thinking about what you would say to Gamzee. Then, your messaging device went off. You ran your fingers over the sheets, looking for it without actually looking, until you felt your hand brush over it. You held it up to your face to see who it was and what they said.

- terminallyCapricious [TC] began trolling [chumhandle] [CH] -  
TC: WhAt tHe mOtHeRfUcK iS uP, mY fInE mIrAcLe Of a SiS? :o) HoNk!

You felt the butterflies flutter in your stomach immediately as you stared down at the message. You contemplated what to say and when you figured it out, your fingers were quick to type it out.

CH: I just woke up with a massive hangover, I shouldn't have drank so much last night. What's up with you?

TC: AwWwW i'M sOrRy, _. iF yOu gEt yOuRsElF aLl uP aNd fEeLiNg bEtTeR lAtEr, wHy dOnT yOu cOmE oVeR tO mY hIve aNd wE'lL mOtHeRfUcKiN' cHiLl? :o)

This is your chance. You can finally tell him how you feel and now you know he feels the same for you. You take a deep, shaky breath before typing our your next message.

CH: Okay! I just took some advil and I'll drink some more water. I'll be over there soon!

TC: ThAt'S tHe MoThErFuCkiN BiTcH tItS, SiS! HoNk!

Now, the only thing left to do is wait until this monster rude hangover is over.


	2. YoU'Re a MiRaClE

It took a few hours, but you were able to start feeling remotely normal after you took a long shower and washed yourself off in the hot water for a while. You even took a seat at the bottom of the bathtub and let it fall over your frame. All the while thinking about Gamzee. What would you say?

After getting dressed, brushing your hair, and applying make-up... you were heading out the door. You passed Dave on your way there and waved goodbye to him, which he replied with a headnod. He knew where you were going. There was no telling where Roxy and Dirk were.

You walked all the way to Gamzee's hive. It was a beautiful, clear night. The stars twinkled with their haunting light and you smiled to yourself peacefully, though your heart felt as if it would beat straight out of your chest. A few deep breaths, you were almost there. You could see him sitting on the beach, he was leaning back on his hands and staring at the ocean with his usual droopy-lidded purple gaze. You could feel a smile and a blush light up your features. You pulled out your messaging device.

-[chumhandle] [CT] began pestering terminallyCapricious [TC]-  
CT: Hehe! I can see you!

You watched as he snapped out of his sopor-pie daze and pulled out his own messaging device. Gamzee looked around for you and, it took him a moment, but when he saw you; he gave a wave and a dopey smile. He patted the ground next to him, signalling you to take a seat. You walked over, trying to control the blush on your face and the racing of your heart, as you sat next to him. You were so close, you were brushing his gray skin with yours. You could smell the sopor slime that reeked on his breath... Yet, you liked it. You liked everything about Gamzee. His deep violet eyes, the way he applied his make-up, the way he spoke that you found oh so cute. Others would tire of his mouth, but you thought it was downright endearing. You hadn't realized you were staring until he glanced over at you and a purple blush ran deeply across his face. It shown even through his make-up, which caused you to blush fiercely in return. You both glanced away from each other quickly in embarrassment.

This is it. You had to say it. You could feel your heartbeat pulsing in your throat. Thump-thump-thump-thump, so fast. You felt as if you might faint. "Hey Gamzee..."

"Yeah, motherfucker?" Gamzee seemed to regain his composure, even going so far as to throw you a flirty smile. He seemed to have noticed your staring. Fuck.

You widened your eyes, if only for a split second. Okay, you couldn't do it. You just couldn't. "Isn't the... uhh, ocean, really beautiful tonight?"

Gamzee seemed a bit disappointed, as if he knew you were trying to lead up to something more. You disappointed yourself, actually. But Gamzee recovered his signature expression. "Yeah, sis, it's all kinds of motherfucking miracles tonight!"

"Want to take a motherfucking swim!?" He exploded rather suddenly, causing you to jump, as he got to his feet. You were so nervous and, making matters worse, you couldn't swim.

"I'm sorry, Gam... I can't swim..."

"What!? You're all up and telling me you've never takin' a bitchin' swim before!?"

You laughed, the pitch was high and strained. Still nervous. But before you could react, Gamzee's hand had taken yours and he pulled you into the ocean with him. You flailed your arms, making a scene, causing water to splash everywhere. "Gamzee, what the fuck are you doing!?"

"I'm teaching you how to motherfuckin' swim, sis!" He had you wrapped in his arms, the water was about waist deep, and his hot breath brushed against your ear from behind. Your own breath caught in your throat. "Calm your tits, _! I've motherfuckin' got you and I won't let you go. _I promise_."

His voice had dropped to a whisper as he said "I promise". It sent a shiver down your spine and you relaxed in his arms. They were so comforting and he held you so tight, so safely. He lowered the both of you into the water at a pace comfortable for you, never letting you go. "See?"

He pulled you into his lap and you both sat there in the water for a while longer... before you got up the courage to lean back into him. You felt a purr through his chest, rumbling against your back, and you could tell he wasn't trying to hide it. Then, before you could stop yourself, you spun around and kissed Gamzee on the lips. He tasted so sweet, even with the taste of sopor still staining his lips. Gamzee was shocked for a moment, but before you could pull away in mortification, he grabbed you gently by your jaw and pulled you deeper into the kiss. When you two broke away, it was for air, and you two stared into each others eyes for what seemed like an eternity.

"What were you really trying to motherfuckin' tell me earlier, _?" Gamzee whispered as he tilted his head forward, pressing your forehead's together romantically.

"I was trying to tell you... that I love you, Gamzee. I have ever since we first met."

A grin tugged at the corners of Gamzee's lips and he pulled you close, pressing your lips together again. You could tell he was still smiling into the kiss.

"I feel red for you, _. You're such a fuckin' miracle and you don't even realize it, motherfucker. Fill a quadrant with me, please?"

"Of course, Gamzee..." You pecked him on the lips once more, entangling your fingers in his inky, soft curls. You still didn't quite understand the concept of troll quadrants fully, but you would do anything for Gamzee. Anything.

After a moment, Gamzee leaned back and your fingers fell through his hair and onto his chest. He gave you a half-lidded, dopey smile once more. "More sloppy make-outs, motherfucker?"

"You're damn right."


	3. LeT mE InSiDe

**_((I warned you once, but I will warn you again... LEMON. DEM LEMONS BE SOUR.))_**

You were awakened by the sound of your messaging device going off. Not the most pleasant awakening of the day and when you turned over to see who was messaging you this early in the night, your frown deepened. You opened your blinds only very slightly to see that it was merely sunset. The sun was barely sinking over the horizon. The troll who messaged you was your best friend, Karkat. Of course.

- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling [chumhandle] [CH] -  
CG: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS ABOUT YOU AND GAMZEE BECOMING MATESPRITES?

You facepalmed hard enough to create a slapping sound that echoed around your room. Why was he always all up in your shit?

CH: Well... it happened!

CG: FUCKASS. WELL I'M GLAD I DIDN'T HAVE TO HELP YOUR DUMBASS OUT WITH YOUR RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS. NICE CHANGE OF FUCKING PACE.

CH: THANK YOU KARKAT, I ENJOY HEARING ABOUT YOUR PROBLEMS.

CG: WHATEVER. JUST DON'T HURT HIM, OKAY?

CH: What kind of girl do you think I am!?

CG: A DUMBASS ONE.

CH: I love you too, Karkat. Now LEAVE ME ALONE, I'M TRYING TO SLEEP.

CG: WHATEVER. GO BACK TO FUCKING SLEEP YOU LAZY PIECE OF SHIT.

-carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling [chumhandle] [CH]-

You tossed your messenger device away from you and buried your face into the pillows, groaning. Not seconds later, it chimed once more. You groaned even louder.

But when you saw who it was, a sparkle entered your amber eyes and a smile lit up your face.

-terminallyCapricious [TC] began trolling [chumhandle] [CH]-  
TC: I'm SoRrY tO aLl uP aNd wAke Up a BeAuTiFuL mIrAcLe tHiS eArLy, bUt I wAs wOnDeRiNg iF yOu cOuLd cOmE bY mY hIvE lAtEr aNd... cHiLl? ;o)

There was a pause in you. Why would he word it like that? Don't worry, you got the innuendo. It was pretty damn obvious, who wouldn't? You stared at your message device, your eyes wide and your pulse sky-rocketing. But then... a smirk painted your face a shade of lust you didn't think you were capable. You were a virgin, in fact.

CH: You know I'll be there, Gamzee. ; )

You never slipped out of the house faster than you did just now. Luckily, you didn't run into anybody on the way out. Even though they were probably wondering where you kept going. At least Dirk, who you haven't spoken to, REALLY spoken to, in... Well, it seemed like forever. The other two... well, they knew exactly where you were going.

It didn't take you long to reach Gamzee's hive. He was waiting for you with the door open, though his eyes were a clear indication that he was high. He was staring into nothing, his posture slumped. But when he saw you approaching, he snapped to attention. He watched the way your hips swayed when you walked, he saw the poorly hidden lust in your eyes. A smirk with promises of how he'd make damn sure you wouldn't be able to walk after you two were done.

When you approached him, he slipped his arms around your waist and pulled you closer to him. You could hear a dark, reverberating chuckle bubble up from his throat, you could see how long he had waited for this moment. After all, you had been matesprites for a long while now and he promised he'd wait until you were comfortable. But that didn't stop the innuendo or the sloppy make-outs.

"Hello, Gamzee..." You purred, the seduction in your voice sending a tremble through his body. Then, he pulled you hungrily into a passionate kiss that only deepened as both of your hands explored each other's bodies. He began backing into the hive and you kicked the door shut. Neither of you could take it any longer. You had to have each other now.

"You have no idea how long I've motherfuckin' waited to touch you, _," Gamzee pulled back, a low growl adorning his voice. The growl of lust. "I'm flushed for you, my amazing motherfucking matesprite."

"I love you too, Gamzee..." You whispered as your lips connected with his jaw and trailed down to his neck, where you gently sucked. Gamzee's growl grew louder, your tongue flicked over his skin, and he trembled once again. You felt his hands underneath your shirt, playing with your erect nipples. You moaned as you bit into his neck gently and you felt his hands slide down lower. He slipped a hand into your shorts, underneath your underwear, and flicked his fingers over your clit teasingly.

Your legs shook with pleasure and you moaned rather loudly, which caused Gamzee to increase the speed of his fingers. He backed you up against the wall as he began to grind you, you felt his erect and squirming member on your upper thigh. You bit your lip, trying to suppress your moans, until Gamzee slipped a finger inside you. That's when you lost it. You started moaning in deep pleasure, your eyes half-lidded. Another finger, you couldn't take it anymore. He was stimulating your G-spot, moving back and forth in a greedy motion. You screamed out in pleasure, you dug your nails into his back. While he bit gently into your neck, so very careful of his sharp teeth. Careful not to puncture the skin, he'd never want to hurt you. Just hear the pleasure in your moans, the absolute euphoria in your mewls.

You knew you were about to climax, you could feel the tightening in your womb. Which is exactly about the point where Gamzee removed his fingers. He slid them from your shorts and licked the juices off his digits, as tantalizing and seductively as he could possibly manage... and you loved it. You were gasping, being so close to your release.

You grabbed Gamzee by the collar of his shirt and kissed him hard, passionately. When you two pulled away from each other, he picked you up, bridal style. He was gasping as well, though less labored than you. It didn't take him but seconds to reach his room and place you gently on the bed.

He grabbed you by your legs and pulled you closer to him, to the point where you could feel him against your entrance through your clothing. He began grinding once more, but you couldn't take it. "Gamzee, please..." you moaned, a whine laced with unbearable lust.

A smirk played on his lips as he pulled away from you and removed your clothes. Sensually, slowly. While you removed his. You exchanged kisses all the while, unable to keep away from each other. Then, Gamzee positioned himself at your entrance and looked up at you. He was silently asking for your approval and you nodded, licking your lips in anticipation.

It sent him over the edge. He couldn't control himself. He slammed into you, causing you to scream. But it didn't hurt, surprisingly. With as much foreplay as Gamzee had used, he slid inside of you rather easily. But you could feel him deep inside you, so deep it felt like he was hitting your stomach. He felt you tighten against him and it caused him to hiss in pleasure, though when he heard you scream, he began to go slower. It was agonizing, how slowly he was thrusting, how much he teased.

"Faster..." You managed to moan, your toes curling and your fingernails digging into his bedsheets. As he increased his pace, your back arched and you almost choked on your moans. You kept mewling his name and once you had adjusted to his length, his girth... He began to switch positions. He lifted your legs over his shoulders and thrust at a more enjoyable pace, though he hit a spot inside of you that caused you to moan sharply. Loudly.

Gamzee's fingers curled around your ankles tightly as he held your legs above your head, then suddenly he pulled out and flipped you over onto your stomach. You got on your knees, arching your back toward the bed and causing your ass to stick into the air. You felt Gamzee squeeze your butt cheeks and yell, "Honk!"

You smiled, though you panted, out of breath. Gamzee pulled your legs apart even further and you felt his tongue poking at your entrance. He slowly slid it in as he continued to squeeze your butt, his nails digging into the flesh; even though they never drew blood. You felt his tongue swirling in a clockwise motion inside you, then switch abruptly to counterclockwise. You bit into his pillows to keep yourself from screaming in absolute and total pleasure. Then his tongue slipped from inside you and began tickling your clitoris, when caused you to squeal into the pillow. Gently, he sucked on it... and you grew louder.

"Mhm, you taste as good as my wicked elixir..." Gamzee managed in a husky tone of voice as he retracted his tongue from you. Finally, he couldn't take it anymore. He slid inside you, doggy style, and began to thrust with as much speed as he could muster. Before you both knew it, you were both screaming out each others names. The intimacy, the passion, the _pleasure_...

That's when Gamzee came inside you and you came with him. Both of you peaking at the same time, both of you moaning. But he kept thrusting, pushing his genetic material deeper and deeper inside of you with each push. Only when he had gone soft, did he pull out and collapse onto the bed.

Gamzee held his arms out for you to climb into, which you gladly did. You curled up against him, listening to the rapid beating of his heartbeat.

"Promise me you'll be mine forever, _?"

You glanced up at Gamzee with such love in your eyes, such compassion, and he met yours with the same. "I promise."


	4. CaRnIvAl

You haven't heard from Gamzee in a couple of days. Which was highly unusual. You two were almost always together. But the last time you had seen him, he'd seemed distant. Preoccupied. There was something in his eyes that you'd never seen before. Perhaps it was that he wasn't losing track of time or staring off into space. You were getting worried. He wouldn't answer any of your messages. Where was he? What was he doing?

GAMZEE'S POINT OF VIEW, EARLIER IN TIME

Gamzee woke up from his slumber in his recooperacoon and rose from his sopor slime, stretching out the sleepiness from his muscles as he yawned. It started off as a normal day for him. He went and washed off the slime, changed his clothes. He had left his messaging device somewhere in his pile of horns he had been tripping out on last night. It slipped his mind as he went to go make more sopor pies.

When he came back, he was still licking the bright green slime off his fingers and thinking of you. Remembering your other night of passion, a devious smile crossed his lips as he finished licking the liquid from his fingers. He went to go find his messaging device to contact you and tell you good "morning", after landing in his pile of horns and listening to the glorious melody of the honks. Ahhh, miracles. He grabbed one of his horns and began honking the shit out of it, losing himself in the sound.

Until he heard his messaging device chirp with a new message. "Oh motherfuck, I all up and forgot to text _!" Gamzee fumbled in the pile for his device, thinking it was you, but only noticed who it ACTUALLY was when he saw Karkat's name pop up instead.

- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling terminallyCapricious [TC] -

CG: HEY ASSHOLE.

TC: Oh MoThErFuCk, It'S yOu, BeSt FrIeNd! I aLl Up AnD tHoUgHt YoU wErE _!

CG: YEAH ABOUT HER...

CG: WE NEED TO TALK

This worried Gamzee, scenarios of things that could have happened to you swam through his thinkpan with vicious ferocity. But he decided to play it off, act light-hearted.

TC: I'm MoThErFuCkIn LiStEnInG, bEsTeSt FrIeNd! : o ) HoNk!

CG: LOOK, SHE'S ACTUALLY A DECENT GIRL... AND GAMZEE, THAT SOPOR SLIME YOU'RE ALWAYS MAKING INTO FUCKING PIES?

CG: IT ROTS YOUR THINKPAN, GAMZEE.

Gamzee stared at the messages for a while, letting it sink into his mind. If sopor slime rots your thinkpan... He didn't want to think about what might happen. All that ran through his mind were memories of you, memories he didn't want to lose. _Never_ wanted to lose. He decided right then and there that he would stop eating the slime. He would do it, if only he could keep you. You were everything to him.

TC: I gEt WhAt yOUr mOtHeRfUcKiNg SaYin, KaRkAt.

CG: GOOD. NOW GO "CHILL" OR WHAT THE FUCK EVER WITH YOUR MATESPRITE. I'M JUST WORRIED ABOUT YOU AND HER, GAMZEE.

TC: YoU jUsT sAvEd mY lIfE, bEsTeSt FrIeNd. HoNk! HoNk! HoNk!

CG: AND IF I FUCKING CATCH YOU EATING SOPOR SLIME AGAIN, I WILL PERSONALLY RIP YOUR NOOKSUCKING JAW OFF SO YOU CAN NEVER EAT AGAIN. GOT IT?

TC: HoNk! : o )

CG: BYE GAMZEE.

- carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling terminallyCapricious [TC] -

It had been days, so long since Gamzee had any sopor slime. The voices in his head... they wouldn't stop talking. They were in his mind constantly, telling him to kill. Kill the lowbloods.**_ KILL THEM ALL._** Paint the walls with their blood, paint the wicked pictures with all the colors. So many colors, miraculous colors. **FROM THEIR BLOOD WILL DRIP HIS MIRACLES.** Their crushed bones would make... _his special stardust._ Those voices telling him TO TAKE CONTROL. BECOME WHAT HE WAS ALWAYS MEANT TO BE. A subjuggulator. Karkat was right, the sopor slime was rotting his thinkpan. Now he knows his true purpose.

**_KILL_**

them

_**ALL**_

Gamzee grabbed his clubs, his make-up smudged beyond belief. His insanity consuming him, as he left his hive in search of THE LOWBLOODS. They all deserved to _die_...


	5. You'll Always Be My Hero

**_((The lyrics are property of Rihanna and Eminem. The song is "Love the Way You Lie, Part 2"))_**

- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling [chumhandle] [CH] -  
CG: OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. I FUCKED UP, _.

You shot toward your messaging device when you heard the chime, your hand quicker than the strike of a snake. You were hoping it was Gamzee, letting you know he was okay. Panic swelled inside your chest as you read Karkat's words. True, undeniable fear.

CH: KARKAT WHAT HAPPENED!?

CG: GAMZEE WENT BATSHIT INSANE. HE'S KILLED THEM ALL. THEY'RE ALL DEAD.

CG: I'M GOING OVER THERE NOW TO SHOOSHPAP HIS ASS TO SHANGRI-LA BULLSHIT HEAVEN, PLEASE TELL ME YOU'LL BE THERE.

You were in shock. Your fingers shaking, your head reeling, your pulse going through the roof. There's no way Gamzee could have done something like that. He'd never hurt a fly. Would he?

CH: Karkat...

CH: WHAT DID YOU DO!?

CG: I TOLD HIM TO STOP EATING SOPOR PIES. I DIDN'T KNOW... I DIDN'T KNOW

CG: HURRY.

- carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling [chumhandle] [CH] -

You ran out of the house at a speed you didn't know you could reach, faster than Dirk. Faster than light. Gamzee was sober. He was _sober_. The panic that constricted your breathing caused you to hyperventilate, though you kept running. You would never stop, never. Not until you reached Gamzee. Not until everything was okay again.

_**On the first page of our story, the future seemed so bright...**_

When you reached Gamzee's hive, the door was open... and there was blood. So many colors. All the colors of the rainbow. You felt sick to your stomach. You wanted to turn and run, something told you to get away. **RUN.** It was smeared all over the ground, as if he had dragged lifeless and bleeding corpses through his door and into his hive. No. **_NO!_**

**_Then the saint turned out so evil... I don't know why I'm still surprised..._**

There was no sign of Karkat. He must be inside. You bolted through the door and into Gamzee's hive, so afraid of what you would see. So afraid.

You were right to be afraid. There were bodies everywhere, a pile of bodies. They had all been decapitated, presumably with Gamzee's bare hands. They were propped up against the far wall, their lifeless eyes staring into the abyss. Though it seemed as if they were still looking at Gamzee's face, their own frozen in fear. Smeared with blood. All colors of the rainbow... The stench was almost too much to bear, the metallic smell of blood choking you. Causing you to cough and dry heave, bend over and hold your nose.

"_," You heard your name weakly called from lungs full of blood. You heard it from behind you and, though you wanted desperately to look away, you turned. It was Karkat... and he was hurt. Beyond belief. He was propped up against the opposite wall, turned to face the bodies. The eyes that never stopped watching. You could see that his rib cage had been beaten into dust by Gamzee's clubs. There was red, crimson blood pouring from his mouth in what seemed to be rivers. It's all you could see, though you were positive that he had broken bones. Broken limbs. "_Run_."

You were frozen, your limbs refused to move. Though everything screamed for you to abscond, you couldn't. You were paralyzed. That's when you heard the honk of a horn, right in your ear. You swung around to find Gamzee, though he was covered in blood. Even his own. Three facial wounds dripped blood from his chin and onto you. He towered over you, in one hand he held a club and in the other he held a horn. "Look who motherfucking SHOWED UP. It's my motherfucking... **MATESPRITE**."

You cringed at his words as he screamed them in your face, the rage in his voice consuming his words. But when you looked into his eyes... You saw that same expression, only it had grown in severity. The look of insanity. You could say nothing.

"Do you like ALL THE MOTHERFUCKING presents I brought you? I wanted to share all this **_MIRACULOUS_** blood with you... My matesprite."

"Gamzee... what did you do...?" You croaked, you forced your lips to form the words. Though they were cracked, terrified. You could feel hot tears running down your cheeks, you could feel yourself tremble as you attempted to back away.

Gamzee lunged at you, using his arms to whirl you around to face the dying Karkat in front of you. You could hear the bubbling in his lungs as he fought to breath, as he held on. Gamzee's club was against your neck and no amount of struggling would set you free.

"I'M SHOWING MY MOTHERFUCKING LOVE TO YOU." He screamed into your ear and your tears fell more freely now, your flinching more violent. "I want you to motherfucking kill Karbro over there. MOTHERFUCKING KILL HIM. He's a lowblood, a mutant. He deserves to die. But you... I'm willing to look past that, you know?"

**"BECAUSE I FUCKING LOVE YOU."**

_**Even angels have their wicked schemes and you take that to new extremes...**_

You were shocked when he forced the club into your hand. His own hand closed around yours, a crushing vice grip that caused you to cry out in pain.

Karkat stared up at you, waiting for you to deliver the final blow. He knew he was dead, he knew that for a fact. It was a given. "Do it, _. Please. I deserve it."

Instead... you whipped around and held the club up as if you were going to smash Gamzee over the head with it. But your grip failed. You couldn't hurt him, you couldn't. You couldn't. The club fell from your hands before Gamzee had a chance to react. But when he did...

He dropped the horn he had been holding in his hand and his fingers were around your neck. Strangling you; there was immense pressure on your windpipe and it felt as if it could snap at any second. "YOU DON'T WANT MY LOVE? **_IS THAT IT!?_**"

He loosened his grip slightly so that you could catch some air into your lungs and answer him. His insane, glazed eyes wide. Bearing into yours with the heat of rage. "Gamzee... Please... I love you."

Gamzee's fist connected with your temple with impossible force, then. You felt yourself crash to the ground, your skull cracking. Your vision swam and the black threatened to dominate. But you fought, you held on. You noticed, suddenly, that Karkat's gurgling breaths have ceased. You noticed everything around you. Your senses were heightened and your body was growing cold. Everything was... so cold.

You didn't feel Gamzee, as he stomped on your ribcage. Breaking bones, causing your own lungs to fill with blood. But you watched him... and you remembered the troll with whom you fell in love. You remembered the laughter you shared, the smiles, the spark of electricity. Even though you didn't recognize him anymore. Seeing his face now...

Wait. No.

Gamzee stopped. His expression changed and, in one moment, you were in his arms. Although you don't remember his leaning down to pick you up off the floor. "_?"

Your lips trembled, your eyelids drooped. Somehow, you found the strength to raise up a hand and stroke his face. The one you remembered, though it was filled with shock. Pain... he'd realized what he'd done. But it was too late.

"I'm still yours, Gamzee. I promised," you gurgled, your crimson blood splattering your lips and his face. Then, there was only the dark to hold you in it's arms.

_**But you'll always be my hero...**_

_**Even though you've lost your mind.**_


	6. BONUS

Gamzee stared down at you in his arms, your broken body. He watched the life fade from your eyes, the beautiful fire that warmed him from the inside out. But now he was left cold. What the _MOTHERFUCK_ have I done?

As your hand fell from his cheek and your blood splattered his face, he stayed as still as a stone statue. All the words he wanted to say caught in his throat, all the apologies, all the feelings. Instead, he sat there for a long while, his fingers brushing over your face. Your red blood smeared across your deathlike features, across his hand. Until he began to shake. Gamzee's purple eyes widened in horror as he brought his hand up to his face, slowly. Shaking violently, he saw all the colors staining his gray skin. Even yours.

It made him sick.

Gently, he lay your lifeless and blood-soaked body down onto the ground. As he stood, he couldn't take his eyes off you. He couldn't believe that you were gone. He didn't want to believe it. This had to be a nightmare. Maybe he'd fallen asleep somewhere in the horn pile, maybe even the bed. But the smells around him invaded his senses and then the tears came. The indigo tears streaming down his cheeks as he fell to his knees beside you. He grabbed your shoulders and began to attempt to shake you awake. "_!? _!?" He screamed, he cried, louder than he thought possible. He did this for so long that his voice had become hoarse. But still he refused to believe it.

It took him another moment before he leaned back and buried his face in his hands. "I'm so sorry, sis... I'm so motherfuckin' **SORRY**..." Gamzee's body shook with rage and, suddenly, he shot up. He lunged for his club and began to smash everything in his hive. The sound of breaking mirrors, the sharp crack of the wood, the loud bangings in his walls. He did this, howling in rage, for so long that he had broken his club into two. Gamzee stood there motionless once it had broken, his chest rising and falling violently, his wide eyes still spilling over with his tears. Staining his cheeks.

Not only had he killed you, he killed all his best friends. He killed all of them. It sent his world reeling and he dropped the broken club as he leaned over and vomited, until he was left dry heaving and clutching his stomach. He stumbled backward a few steps before he caught his balance and made his way to his recuperacoon, he knew what he had to do now. He fell to his knees in front of it and began shoving handfuls of sopor slime into his mouth. He didn't stop, he couldn't stop, until he felt his stomach stretching to it's absolute limits. That's when he picked himself up off the floor; more stumbling, unable to walk. He crashed into several objects, then into the floor. He began crawling his way over to your corpse. Every little inch seemed like it took an eternity, his world was crashing around him. He could hear his own sobs and he could feel them racking his chest, but he couldn't control himself.

When he made it over to your body, he wrapped his arms around you once more and held you close to him. "I promised I'd never motherfuckin' let you go, my fine miracle of a matesprite," he slurred, "I'm going to keep... my... motherfuckin'... _promise_."

That's when the both of you fell, never to wake up again. Yet his arms were still wrapped around you, refusing to let go. Now he could keep you safe. Nothing would ever hurt you anymore. Not so long as he never let go again.

IN A DREAM BUBBLE

You were sitting on the beach, Gamzee's beach. It felt as if you had been there for years, staring out at the deep blue of the ocean. Watching the tide reel in and pull away. Your arms wrapped around your knees, you stared. What else could you do?

"_?"

Your eyes widened and you spun around. You needed conformation... and you got it. There Gamzee was, in his usual high state, while he slouched with droopy eyelids. His hands stuffed into his pockets, his brain refusing to register that you were here. With him.

"GAMZEE!" You yelled as you fumbled to your feet, sending sand flying in all directions. You ran over to him and he held out his arms for you, until you came crashing into his body. Gamzee stumbled backward a few steps before clutching you close to his chest and nuzzling your hair.

"I'm motherfuckin' here, _," he whispered as he held you closer. Your sweet scent invaded his nostrils and he breathed in deep, rocking you back and forth slowly. You held onto him with all your strength, your head resting against his chest. Though you heard no heartbeat.

When Gamzee pulled away, he cupped his hands around your cheeks and looked deeply into your eyes. "I'm so motherfuckin' sorry, you don't even know, _. So, so motherfuckin' sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry, Gamzee..." Your hand stroked his own cheek as he looked down at you, a soft and compassionate smile playing across your lips. "I forgive you... and I love you."

Then, he pulled you into his arms and buried his face into the crook of your neck. He was grinning now, his body shaking with relief, his tears dripping onto your shoulder. "I never meant to hurt you... you're my motherfuckin' matesprite."

"I know, Gamzee," you whispered and your arms wrapped around his neck as one of your hands stroked his hair. His silky, inky hair. "I know."


End file.
